
Vocally Speaking: Vocal Cancer; How Far Has
it Already Metastasized?
Written by Diana Yampolsky
Being teaching and
producing vocals
in Canada for over thirty years, it never
ceases to amaze me how many people have gone
for conventional
vocal training,
practicing, the least to say, nonsensical
and leading nowhere exercises - and think
that one day they are going to wake up with
a wonderful
voice
and be able to sign a million dollar
record deal.
A lot of them were
complaining that they were feeling quite
strange making sounds, some of which
reminding them of cats meowing and wolves
howling. I'm sure if the latter would hear
those people, they would be extremely
jealous, as those
singers
were sounding "better" than the original
mammals.
A lot of these people
after years and years are still trying to
make some sense of it, while concurrently
ruining their voices, as they were told that
if their
throats hurt
to the point that they are losing any
presence of their voices, that is good,
because their muscles are working and they
must be doing something right. Nevertheless,
some of them ended up needing laser surgery
and, luckily, some of them
I could help
non-surgically.
If we could imagine
for a second that those exercises actually
meant anything positive for someone's voice,
why did nobody ever explain how to apply
them to the actual given song? The answer is
very simple - these strange sounds and
exercises are not applicable. I'm sure some
readers have been through "Myam's", "Neigh,
neigh, neighs", "Goo, goo, gooks", "Zay, Yay,
Yay, Yays..." and "Prrrrrrrrr" (lip trills).
For years I have been
doing a lot of seminars and vocal
interactive workshops - not only locally,
but all around the world - my opening line
has always been, "I did not come here to
prove anybody wrong or to prove myself
right, I came here to show you something
different. And now you can accept it or
reject it". I often find skeptical people
who have been taught exactly what I have
described above and they tried to contradict
what I have to say. On that note, I usually
offer them a $1000 reward if they can show
me how they can apply their "Goo, goo, ga
ga's" to a real song. Nobody has been able
to do it so far. And I am talking worldwide
and not just locally in Toronto.
So the vocal cancer
has evidently spread, ie. metasticized, and,
as far as I am concerned, is gradually
killing people's dreams and health, as
conventional vocal coaching is very
dangerous for people's anatomy (and not only
vocal), physiology as well as their mental
state.
With respect to
anatomy, not only vocal boxes are getting
hurt, but also the lower abdominal muscles,
lower back and posture as a whole. Some
skinny young girls were coming with their
stomachs sticking out and I had to inquire
as to if they were perhaps five months
pregnant. One answered, "No, I'm not even
sexually active". Then "what" I exclaimed?
The answer was that the girl from age 7 to
her current age of 18 was pushing her
stomach out following the instructions of
the conventional
vocal coaching
and naturally wore out her abdominal wall.
So now on the skinny
body there was a big stomach. I asked her if
she felt a pain in her lower back while
predominantly knowing the answer, which
ultimately was yes. As by the suggestion of
her former
vocal coach,
she was to push everything down to the floor
and look like a question mark and then of
course, she sounded and looked like a
"pregnant ballerina" would. A lot of people
were walking at me with their pelvis bones
sticking forward - meaning their upper body
was inclined backwards - and when I told
them to lean forward towards me (as the
sound is supposed to be lifted up and above
the body), they were sticking their stomach
and pelvis out even more.
Needless to say, for over 30 years of
practice in Canada, I have seen it all in
the full ugliness and almost near fatality,
at least vocally speaking. The question is,
"Is there a cure and can we stop the
spread?"